‘Today is today, and tomorrow is a new day. This has helped us immensely throughout the entire journey.’
Madelief (10) had a brain tumor. Her mother, Ilse, tells how she's doing and how they have experienced the past year. ‘It was a tough year, for Madelief, for us as parents, and also for our other children. But in a certain way, it will also make them stronger and teach them to look at life differently.’
In the summer of 2023, Madelief (10) fell ill. She was vomiting a lot and could barely eat or drink. Was it a stomach virus, or maybe migraines? For a moment, it seemed like things were getting better. Fortunately, they were still able to go on vacation. But a few weeks later, the nausea returned, along with extreme headaches. During a soccer training session, her mother, Ilse, noticed that Madelief was walking awkwardly, as if she were drunk. After several emergency visits to the doctor’s office, it became clear: Madelief has a brain tumor.
Complaints
Mother Ilse: ‘Madelief came downstairs crying in the morning: ‘I have such a headache, mom.’ The paracetamol I gave her came right back up. She was constantly vomiting. I recognized it from earlier that summer when she had similar symptoms. But after that, she felt good for a few weeks: we had a nice vacation, she participated in a musical summer school, and was enthusiastically playing soccer. Madelief loves singing and acting. And making TikToks, of course. She’s not much of a talker, but on stage, she can express her feelings well. She’s always happy. But on that day in September, none of that was true.’
Diagnosis
Ilse felt something was wrong. ‘In a flash, I thought: It can’t be a brain tumor, can it?’ The symptoms persisted, and Madelief had become very weak. ‘I took a bucket from the sandbox, put Madelief in the car, and drove again to the doctor’s office. I demanded that she be admitted. When a second doctor came to look at the MRI scan, I thought: ‘This is not good.’ After a nerve-wracking time in the waiting room, the doctor said: ‘We see a space-occupying process, you need to go to the Princess Máxima Center immediately.’
At the Máxima
It turns out that Madelief has a high-grade aggressive brain tumor, a medulloblastoma. ‘After hearing this news, the ground seemed to fall out from under us. We still hoped it was a benign tumor, but unfortunately, an intensive treatment plan was necessary. First, surgery, then 30 radiation treatments and six courses of chemotherapy. Madelief is a pragmatic girl: ‘If this needs to happen, we’re just going to do it.’ The neurosurgeon stressed: ‘Take the treatment step by step, don’t rush ahead. Today is today, and tomorrow is a new day.’ This has helped us tremendously throughout the entire process.’
Playing outside in the exercise garden
Fortunately, Madelief finds the Máxima to be a nice hospital. Ilse: ‘But as soon as she walks into the center, she stops eating and talking. That’s due to the tension. When a brother or sister comes along, things get much better! Then she has plenty of distractions. Especially with her big brother Oliver (11), she becomes very mischievous and has a lot of fun: playing outside in the exercise garden, or going to the music studio. Then they crawl behind the DJ booth and play loud music with a grin on their faces.’
Flower bead
Last June, Madelief received her last chemotherapy and the Flower bead. Ilse: ‘Of course, it’s great that the treatment is over, but recovery is just starting now. She has appointments with the physiotherapist, psychologist, and regular check-ups. Madelief needs to regain strength, she’s been through so much this past year. The radiation period in Groningen was especially tough for her; six weeks away from our home in Breda. Luckily, Madelief is gaining more and more energy and is resilient. During her last chemotherapy, she was even roller-skating. She keeps going, and when it’s too much, she rests.’
A year later
Mother Ilse: ‘I often think about last year, when we didn’t know what to expect. It’s summer vacation again now, and the suitcases are packed. The year has stood still, but at the same time, a lot has changed. Recently, Madelief had to vomit again. I was very scared: ‘Am I going to worry about this for the rest of my life?!’ But then I realize that it’s just bad luck that this happened to us. We couldn’t have prevented it. It was a tough year, for Madelief, for us as parents, and also for our other children. But in a certain way, it will also make them stronger and perhaps teach them to look at life differently.’
Advice for other parents
‘As a tip for other parents in the Princess Máxima Center, I would say: live in the moment. Maybe your child is having a down day today. But tomorrow could be better. You can’t take away your child’s struggles, and that makes it really tough. If today is a bad day, you can hope together that tomorrow will be a good day.’
Also read:
- ‘When children ask about my condition, it feels a bit vulnerable. But I always tell them.’Keshon (11) has had a brain tumor since he was three years old. Together with his parents, Loudis and Sebastiaan, he shares his story: ‘I think cancer is kind of a big word. It scares people. Still, I think it’s good to talk about it.’
- ‘Take things one step at a time and ask yourself each day: what can be done?’Three and a half years ago, Emelie (then 12) was carefree on the ski slopes. But only a few weeks after coming home, her eyesight began to deteriorate rapidly. The cause turned out to be a brain tumor. Now Emelie is 16. Together with her parents, Matthijs and Lisanne, Emelie shares how she is doing now and how she lives with her visual impairment.
- ‘I want to help others who are in the same situation and show them how you can still stay positive.’Amid all the everyday messages in our inbox, an email from Vincent (18) suddenly appears. He has a medulloblastoma, a tumor near the cerebellum. He very much wants to share what being ill is like: ‘I cannot be cured anymore. I do not have much time left. Right now I can feel very sad and think only about that, but I can also think about everything that is still possible.’